"Hidden You"

Summer going to into 6th grade my parents bought an Xbox 360 and Rock Band to go with it. They bought the complete set; the guitar, the microphone, and the drums. I spent most of the time playing the drums. The first night we got it, my brother and I got into an argument over who would play the drums for the next song. I said I should because I was already on them, but my parents said I had to let someone else have a turn. Angrily, I got up and picked up the microphone instead. I told him I was going to pick the song since he got to play the drums(I was a bratty 11 year old). I decided on "I Think I'm Paranoid" by a band called Garbage, I knew some of the song, but not all of it. My dad took the guitar, my mom, other siblings, and friend Sydney all sat on the couch opposite us. I didn't know anyone was listening to me - hell, I didn't know anyone listened to me in general - but halfway through the song my dad turns to me and says "You're a really good singer, Paisley". My face flushed. The attention was on me now, everyone trying to listen to me for once. I froze. I stopped singing. I said thank you to my dad and quietly sang the rest of the song.

In 7th grade, I made the blod decision to take choir instead of band. The only people who heard me sing was my choir teacher and the people who stood next to me, and my friends - if they could hear me. I took choir all the up until my senior year in high school. I got comments from my classmates and my friends saying I was a good singer. 

Senior year rolls around and I'm not in choir anymore simply because I didn't want to stay at the same level and I didn't like anyone in the level above. Every year at school they do this thing called "Coffee House". Basically, all of the artsy kids gets on stage and sing, or play an instrument, or paint, or draw, or read their poetry, or other people's poetry, whatever. I thought about whipping out my bongos, guitar, ukuele even and getting on stage and singing a song. I thought long and hard about this decision and I decided I wasn't going to because I cannot handle having so much attention on me.

I love singing and playing my instruments, and just music in general. I had my grunge phase in 6th grade as opposed to everyone else who had theirs in high school. I even got a treble clef tattooed on my wrist. 

The attention any type of audience gives me is too overbearing for me to get up and show case my talent. 

If I could take anyone with me on this trip, I'd take Ashton Irwin from 5 seconds of Summer because he's always doing something outside - whether he's camping, or going out and living in the mountains in New Zealand. I think that'd be really helpful for me because I'm not outdoors-y. At all. Whatsoever.

 I'm just a white girl with an iPhone who took a walk with her Senior Literature class after reading an excerpt from Thoreau's "Walking" essay. The weather was nice which helped make the walk nice. I have that class with my best friend since 4th grade, so it was nice to talk and walk at the same time. We strayed far away from the rest if the class, just wandering. Wandering and her talking about her boyfriend, and me talking about a new band I like.  A quote I really like from Thoreau's essay is, "They who never go to the Holy Land in their walks, as they pretend, are indeed mere idlers and vagabonds; but they who do go there are saunterers in the good sense, such as I mean. Some, however, would derive the word from sans terre without land or a home, which, therefore, in the good sense, will mean, having no particular home, but equally at home everywhere." Not many people take walks just for the sake of walking, Everyone's so busy, but I really enjoyed the walk I took - even if it was a school assignment. If  didn't have to come back to get my stuff, I could've kept waking. I could've walked to St. Louis, Chicago, if I really wanted to. Once I start, I don't really have to stop. Pretty sure there's a Metallica song related to this... Wherever I May Rome, I think it's called. 

England

Walkign up to the apartment complex I live in, I stop first to check the Mail. The first thing I see is an envelope for me from travelocity. A couple weeks ago, I decided I was going to go to England.
I get inside and get out a tote bag and pack only a couple outfits, my wallet, my toothbrush; basically, I'm packing light. I grab my keys off the table and head for the door. Before I can even open the door my roommate shouts, "Where are you going?" from the other room.
I shout back, "England!"
Then I heard some clanking and her tumbling out of her room.
"England?! What do you mean England? You can barely pay rent! Rent that we split." She sounds infurious.
"Yeah, well, I'm just tired of being in Missouri. I wanna travel and see new things, and meet new people. I feel like I'm stuck in such a rut working at the same job everyday, seeing the same people "who order the same thing every time they come in. Or coming home to the same apartment everyday doing the same old routine I've been doing." I say and let out a sigh.
She just stands there looking down at her feet.
"How are you getting there?" She looks up.
"Not sure, I was just going to wing it."
"Is that all you're brinigng with you?" She's says softly, pointing at my bag.
I nod.
We both stand there silently, expecting each other to say something, but neither of us do. I head for the door again, but she stops me. Again.
"I could drive you to New York if you wanted..."
"You don't have to-" she cuts me off.
"No, I want to! I'll even pay for gas because I know you don't have that much money. I've always wanted to go there anyway."
"You'd really do that?" I'm gettign excited.
"Of course! You've been my best and closest friend since elementary school!" She says pulling me in for a hug.
"I love you."
"I love you, too. Go pack your things." I say pulling away.
She runs off to do so and comes back twenty minutes later with three full suitcases.
My eyes go wide.
"How long are you planning on staying there?"
"Probably like a week, maybe two" She says grinning.
"let's go then." I say grabbing a suitcase from her, helping her to get her things to her car. I reach for the door and she doesn't stop me this time.
We put her stuff in the trunk and I keep my small bag of only a few things with me.


A day or two later and we're in Indiana.
"I'm so tired of driving for hours. Let's do something fun." my friend complains.
"Yeah, sure."
"We're in Indiana, so I say we check out the World War Memorial Plaza, and just kind of check out the downtown area."
"Sounds good to me."
We tour through the museums and admire the sculptures and fountains, and I can't help but praise how beautiful everything is.


After a week on the road traveling through Illinois, Indiana, Ohio, and Pennsylvania(stopped by Scranton, did not see Dunder Mifflin. It was worth a try) we finally made it to New York. We stopped at so many places and saw so many beautiful things. Luckily, she offered to pay for everything we did.
"Well... Here we are. John F. Kennedy airport." I say, ready to go to England.
"You only have $500 to your name, how are you getting to London?" She looks over at me.
"I bought my ticket a few weeks prior, why do you think I'm so broke?" We both laugh.
"

Bucket list

• Meet all of one direction - including zayn 
• Tell someone my life story 
• Meet 5sos
• Travel. Go everywhere. Learn about new cultures. Meet new people.
• Graduate beauty school 
• Become a stylist for a successful band
• Keep my high school friends after high school
• Move out of my parents house and live on my own
• Get more cats
• Get more tattoos
• Go to more concerts
• Get married maybe ??
• Have kids maybe ??
• Be a disney princess at disney land
• Fall in love
• Break boys hearts and feel no remorse
• Own a car
• Own a motorcycle
• Get in a fist fight (and win)
• Get my life together
• Perfect seth rogen's laugh
• Learn how to swim
• Build a tree house
• Own a golf cart 
• Meet my online friends
• Bake/make something Pinterest worthy 
• 5/5 and 4/4 
• Meet Matty healy
• Take in a stray pet
• Go to space
• Pay a strangers bill 
• Not be broke all the time
• Write a best seller
• Learn how to play the drums
• Be in a band
• Own multiple exotic pets
• Learn Korean